I am a mom.
Sometimes the world will look down on that title.
"What do you do?"
"I'm a mom"
"oh, that's nice"
I used to try and make it more impressive--like telling them all the things I do besides being just a mom. "I like to dabble with graphic design" or "I like to blog" I would say. I would try to tell them things that would keep them interested in talking to me in the conversation. If I told them I was just a mom and that I stayed home with my kids, the conversation would quickly turn elsewhere. That was frustrating for me since I like to be part of the conversation, too.
For a long time I wanted to be more than just a mom.
I worked on making my blog better. I worked on trying to sell things at boutiques and craft fairs. I tried to freelance a little in the graphic design world. Even got some small design jobs that I got paid for. Mostly, I tried to come up with ideas to be fun and interesting to other people...and then blog about it so my blog would be cool too.
And then I had Sam.
Now I struggle to do all the things I'd become an expert at. I struggle to get all my errands done in a week, let alone one day. I struggle to get the laundry done, the dishes done, the house kept picked up. I struggle to remember the simplest things. I can get off the phone and completely forget about something I was supposed to do right when I hung up! I feel like I was losing my mind!! It took me over a month to finish a wreath for my front door that I used to be able to get done in a day. I feel like an Olympic gold medalist when I can get dinner ready by 6:30 or both the kids in bed by 8:00! The only thing I seem to get accomplished some days is getting Sam to take a good nap and actually taking a shower.
I still want to be cool, and interesting, and have a really fun blog for my friends to read. But I worry about every post that I put up that is just more pictures of Sam...more pictures of my kids! I worry that I would lose readers if I am not posting at least one new project a week. I don't want to be someone that just posts about my kids and outings to the aquarium all the time. I feel like I have more to offer than that.
Then one late late night, I realized that this is what my life just happens to be right now.
I am a mother.
and that is enough.
They take up all my time now, and that is okay!
They need me...a lot! And that is okay.
It may take me a whole month to do a project. And that is okay.
I can put up nothing but pictures of my kids on my blog and that is okay. They are my life right now.
If Luke needs me to stop folding laundry to read him a book, then I will leave a pile of laundry on the couch to do just that. He will only be with me for a few short years before I turn him over to the elementary schools during the day. I know that I will miss having him around when that time comes. I will miss finding toys in funny places and having him as my little buddy in the shopping cart at stores.
If I need to spend thirty minutes rocking Sam in a dark room to get him to settle down for a nap, then I will do just that. I will appreciate the quickly fleeting moments of peace with a snugly baby because I know that they will be gone all too soon.
I love this talk, but especially this quote because it reminds me of what is important right now in my life and as a mom:
If you are still in the process of raising children, be aware that the tiny fingerprints that show up on almost every newly cleaned surface, the toys scattered about the house, the piles and piles of laundry to be tackled will disappear all too soon and that you will—to your surprise—miss them profoundly. ~President Thomas S. Monson; Finding Joy in the Journey
I am a mother.
I need to be a mother.
There will be time for everything else later.
Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful post! This is the sentiment that is conveyed in the book "I Am a Mother" by Jane Clayson Johnson. It changed my perspective and made it okay to change my identity to JUST being a mother. At Time Out For Women, one of the speakers said that your children deserve a happy person for a mother, and that is what I try to give them.ReplyDelete
I think there's something in my eye...ReplyDelete
I love this! What's most important, in the big scheme of things? Our families. Well said, Katie.ReplyDelete
Good for you Katie. I totally understand. It's a hard thing to realize what's best for your family. It's fun to keep things crafty and hip and cool but your babies won't e babies very long. Cuddle and love them all you can.ReplyDelete
Loves to you. Enjoy your time with your adorable boys!
I love this post Katie. Don't worry, I don't think you'll lose readers. You have a very engaging writing style, and I for one LOVE hearing about your boys!ReplyDelete
This is amazing post, Katie. Thank you so much for being the mommy and wife that my grandkids and son deserve. You make life joyful for them all and your mother-in-law appreciates you for who you are, not just what you do (and you do a lot!)ReplyDelete
Love to you all!
If any irrational people ever look down on your mom title, just tell them that stay at home moms are worth about $70,000 a year. Child care is expensive, buying things rather than crafting is expensive, missing out on those moments with your kids is something that can't be replaced. You're a great mom! Your kids wont grow up to be serial killers:-)ReplyDelete
You are a mother! Mothers are wonderful. Love you. Your hair looks amazing in that last pic. ;)ReplyDelete
I just found this post and it is so sweet! I sent the link to my daughter who is "just" a mom to 3 and one about to make his appearance... Her children think she is the best mom on the planet, what a gift!ReplyDelete
I am now 55 and independent. I now have the chance to do all that I always wanted to do. How do I choose to spend my time? As a grandma and a mom... Even though my kids are grown, they still need me. There are times in their lives that only mom will do and I am lucky to be able to fill that need.
Of all that I will ever accomplish, the thing that has been the hardest and the most rewarding is being a mom. All of God's blessing to you for figuring that out while your kids can benefit from your wisdom!